Local TAMPA business
~ break-up/divorce support, books, videos, movies, & services ~
❤ CONSCIOUS UNCOUPLING takes some of the trauma and drama OUT of the equation by focusing on the LOVE & "completion of a relationship"
instead of the pain of the relationship breaking up or "ending"!
Losing a Relationship Has Same Stages of Grief as Death
Losing a love relationship takes you through the same stages of grief associated with death—denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin .... Refer to their Divorce as "Conscious Uncoupling"
In this Good Morning America video on ABC in 2014, the concept of CONSCIOUS UNCOUPLING is explained as "modeling love and support" especially important if there are children involved.
Article Referenced in Video:
By Dr. Habib Sadeghi and Dr. Sherry Sami
[click on the article title above to read it]
Oxford Languages Definition of Uncouple
present participle: uncoupling
1. disconnect [something, especially a railroad vehicle that has been coupled to another]
"They uncoupled the engine."
2. become disconnected
"I have seen marriages uncouple under the strain."
3. release [hunting dogs] from being fastened together in couples
The verb "uncouple" dates back to the thirteenth century and though it can be used both transitively and intransitively with the general meaning 'disconnect', it's almost always associated with railway carriages (which, when they're connected, are, conversely, said to be coupled).
The figurative use of uncoupling in the description of relationships may therefore sound rather bizarre to native speaker ears, but isn't in fact brand-new, evidence of it being used in this way dating as far back as the 1940s.
Since romantic relationships are such a fundamental part of life, it's no surprise that our need to identify, describe and discuss them proves a fertile breeding ground for new words and expressions.
An Alternative to Painful Divorce,
How to Consciously Uncouple
by Vishen Lakhiani
April 15th, 2019
Vishen's Two Rules
Vishen asks himrself:
1. "What did I learn from this?"
"How can I grow?"
"How will this increase my rate of self-evolution?"
2. How can I serve the world better?
[especially now that I have more time on my hands]
How do you end a relationship on good terms? It is undoubtedly a question that has plagued the minds of many. The end of a romantic relationship however doesn't necessarily mean pain and suffering ensues, with human consciousness evolving so is the way we deal with life's challenges.
In this talk from Mindvalley Reunion 2019, Vishen Lakhiani discusses the alternative couples have when they decide together that the relationship has come to an end.
After 19 years together Vishen and his wife decided to consciously uncouple and divorce. They also chose to redefine divorce. Divorce, a word that creates so much negative emotion in so many. Rather than a usual divorce they went through the Conscious Uncoupling process, the method popularised in Katherine Woodward Thomas’ book of the same name. In this video, Vishen lays himself raw and open like never before to talk about facing this moment in his life.
What does "conscious uncoupling" mean in a relationship?
conscious uncoupling also consciously uncoupling
❤ the act of ending a marriage or romantic relationship in a way which shows that the two people believe that this is a positive thing for their future lives
❤ a euphemism for amicable separation, splitting up, breaking up, or plain old divorce
❤ refers to the act of ending a marriage or relationship, but in a way that is viewed as a very positive step by both parties, who believe that their lives will be better for doing so, and that they can continue to remain friends, co-parent if they have children, and possibly not even stop loving each other
❤ A method of dealing with breakups in a positive way by focusing on the idea of 'completing' [rather than ending] a relationship and, through lessons learned along the way, being empowered to move on with life as a better person equipped to succeed in any further relationships
Katherine Woodward Thomas
Jan 22, 2018
During Typical Beakups/Divorces,
Couples Have Tendency To Go From
"SOUL MATE" to "SOUL HATE"
Katherine Woodward Thomas is the creator of the Conscious Uncoupling Process, made famous by Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, who used her now infamous term to announce their own divorce.
Most of us know that breakups are often filled with hostility and festering hurts that can take months if not years to fully heal. In the midst of a breakup, it's easy to behave in unconscious and antagonist ways, even for the most conscious and caring of us.
Yet none of us want to break up in ways that will do irreparable damage to ourselves, each other and our children if we have them.
Conscious Uncoupling is the first program of its kind, and provides a 5-step blueprint for how to breakup better!
Come learn these 5 simple steps of how to end a romantic union in honorable and loving ways, and discover how to live your happily even after life.
Breakups = Biggest Traumas We Face
[Judith Herman calls it "Rupture of Attachment"]
---> we're in Fight, Flight, or Freeze<----
Katherine Woodward Thomas, M.A., MFT is the author of the New York Times Bestseller Conscious Uncoupling: 5 Steps to Living Happily Even After which was nominated for a Books for a Better Life Award, and the national bestseller, Calling in “The One:” 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life. She is also a licensed marriage and family therapist and teacher to thousands from all corners of the world in her virtual and in-person learning communities.
Katherine is the originator of the Conscious Uncoupling process made famous by Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin as well as creator of the Calling in “The One:” 49 Days to Love online course. To date, Katherine has trained and credentialed hundreds of people as Certified Conscious Uncoupling Coaches and as Certified Calling in “The One” Coaches.
Katherine has also had the honor of being interviewed by Maria Shriver on her infamous Architects of Change series, was a main stage speaker at Lewis Howes Live Summit of Greatness Annual Conference, and has been privileged to share the stage with Alanis Morissette, Marianne Williamson, Neale Donald Walsch, Jean Houston, Mary Manin Morrissey and other extraordinary teachers.
Her life-affirming and highly transformative teachings been featured on The Today Show as well as in The New York Times, Time Magazine, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, The London Times, People Magazine, Women’s Health and many other media outlets throughout the world.
"Divorce Ceremonies" VS "Divorce Parties"?
Which is right for you?
honoring the good of the relationship and the people involved
A divorce ceremony is a ceremony that celebrates the end/completion of a marriage, civil union or relationship. They can involve either one or both members of the separating couple. Divorce ceremonies often involve a toast that emphasizes the couple beginning new chapters in their lives. Similar to weddings, divorce parties take on many tenors and serve different purposes.
Divorce ceremonies that couples co-host often have a serious tone, and are aimed at healing the rifts among family and friends that divorces may cause. They acknowledge the good, even as the marriage is ending, and attempt to let go of the accompanying anguish. When a couple co-hosts a party, they often celebrate what they’ve shared and ask friends and family for support them as they separate.
Acknowledging your loss with a ritualistic ceremony will make you better able to transition through these difficult stages. You'll be giving yourself the opportunity to bury the darkness of your past, so you can move forward to a brighter future. And that's not just opinion—divorce ceremonies have become a highly popular trend all around the world!
honoring the possibilities of new happiness in the future
A divorce party is more of a celebration in which couples have become independent of one another and these parties are often an announcement of newfound singledom. These divorce parties are often equated to bachelor or bachelorette parties and involve divorce cakes, wedding ring coffins, just-divorced banners, and divorce rings (a notched, or broken, circle). A recent CNN article on the subject of divorce parties noted that divorce parties are growing in popularity, and helping alleviate the stigma surrounding the end of marriage. They are usually celebrated without their ex but SOMETIMES are celebrated together after the divorce ceremony just like a wedding reception party.
Laura Dave wrote the first novel about divorce parties, which is entitled The Divorce Party. Christine Gallagher developed the divorce party concept in her book "The Divorce Party Handbook".
There are many awesome books out there...too many to name. Here are a few recommended books on the subject of divorce, breaking up, starting over, and being happy again.
by Katherine Woodward Thomas MA MFT
5 Steps to Living Happily Even After
– October 18, 2016
Movie: THE DIVORCE PARTY Official Trailer (2019)
Movie: THE DIVORCE CEREMONY (2006)
"The Divorce Ceremony" starring Apollonia Kotero and J.D. Mata
2006; 1h 13m
How can we help?
We provide workshops on all aspects of relationships and communication. Perhaps you did some things you were not proud of within the relationship. Find out WHY so it doesn't happen again in the next relationship.
Like Vishen Lakhiani says, figure out how to grow [and how you grew] from this relationship experience. Then see how you can better serve the world.
We will also be providing Divorce Ceremonies officiants as an option for couples to help them with the closure and to model this concept to family and friends [so they can better understand and therefore be more supportive].
An article about divorce isn't probably expected in a business that celebrates LOVE, but facts and stats are IMPORTANT. Below is a link to an article titled "Divorce Statistics: Over 115 Studies, Facts and Rates for 2020" by Wilkinson & Finkbeiner Family Law Attorneys in San Diego, CA.