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Welcome
to The Love Relationshop!
LOVE MUSINGS BLOG
~ fun, healthy, interesting, informative, funny,
or sexy stories & articles
❤
Brain [neuroscience] VS the Mind [psychology]
Brain [neuroscience] VS the Mind [psychology]
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
March 2022
♥ In our upcoming workshops, we explore how the brain [neuroscience] and the mind [psychology] work in your LOVE life! I designed this INFINITY symbol with the two main things we learn about in The Love Relationshop. It is fascinating and a lot of the world makes sense. MORE TO COME...I just had to share my creation. ♥
Video Killed the Radio Star
Video Killed the Radio Star
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
September 2022
Ok folks. I'm ALL IN! I've been building this business from scratch for months now ...from a mere idea that's been brewing and building in my mind for YEARS...and I have AVOIDED doing any an all video and audio. Until now. GULP.
I'm nervous ..or CRAZY ... because I'm the person who has to re-record my outgoing voicemail 100 times before being ""happy enough" to accept it. Truthfully, by the time I finally accepted an outgoing VM message, I'm not sure if I'm happy with the results or just exhausted. And that is after I typed it all up so all I have to do is READ it. [laughing at myself here...oh my goodness. What have I done? lol ]
THIS is SO FAR out of my comfort zone.
But I will live. As my good friend Kristi Leeper says, "I can risk because I can recover."
What is all my babbling about? This month, I started my very first podcast, Patreon, and YouTube Channel that is meant for the PUBLIC. [GULPING AGAIN!!] Ok, ok, so nothing is OUT THERE yet. It's been a WHOLE thing just getting the right programs [FREE] and then LEARNING them. Then figuring out what I'm going to SAY. Oh, wait. I need AN INTRO and a summary about my channel. And about me. I need to encourage people to LIKE and SUBSCRIBE! Then I have to figure out my hair [man, I gotta get in to the beauty shop] and my clothes and my background. Oh. and camera, microphone, and lighting! I wrote my first article. Made it into a slide presentation. Practiced 25 times. Well, it was SUPPOSED to be the real thing but I messed up so I had to start over again. 25 times and counting. Yeesh.
Well, I did all that. YAY. I know the first couple times are the hardest with almost everything. It's a process.
All I keep singing in my head is that song from the 80s, "Video Killed the Radio Star'.
Well, here I go anyway!!! Wish me luck.
xoxo, Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
September 2022
Top 10 Critical Communication Skills for Couples
Top 10 Critical Communication Skills for Couples
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
February 2022
❤ My mom and me... before working on our relationship [above, 2014] and getting to the relationship I always wanted with my mom [below, 2016]. She passed away just a month after this was taken.
Identify & Start Showing Up as "Your True Authentic Self"
Identify & Start Showing Up as "Your True Authentic Self"
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
January 2022
Identifying your "true authentic self" means that you find out what YOU WANT in life and WHO YOU WANT TO BE regardless of your social, cultural, religious, family and self expectations. It means you toss out the shame, guilt, and fear. You get rid of negative self talk.
Instead of obligations [where you feel negative emotions of HAVING TO DO something], you plan YOUR LIFE with THINGS YOU WANT TO DO because of WHO YOU ARE and WHO YOU WANT TO BECOME which feels like a choice and so it feels GOOD. [AKA ...HOW do you want to show up in life?] You could very well have the same things on your "WANT TO DO LIST" as what's on your "OBLIGATIONS LIST" but it just FEELS sooooo different!!
Byron Katie talks about this [and I'll paraphrase here because it's been so long since I heard/read it]. She gave the example of wanting a clean house. ME wanting a clean house but then expecting everyone else to keep the house clean is an entirely different expectation. In this case, I am putting MY WANT/desire [of a clean house] and turning it into an OBLIGATION for yourself AND EVERYONE ELSE IN THE HOUSEHOLD without their permission. It usually turns into a power struggle...sometimes really ugly struggle.
DO THIS MIND SHIFT INSTEAD: If having a clean house is something, YOU want, then go forward with joy in your heart and do it for YOURSELF without putting guilt and shame on others. Or hire someone to do it. The point is in WHERE the feelings originate from [forced obligations VS love and acceptance]...and what the feelings then lead to [anger, guilt, shame, fear VS joy].
Here's a very personal example in my life :
I moved 1700 miles to take care of my mom who was dying from pancreatic cancer. I left Seattle [where I absolutely loved living] and went back to cold Minnesota [where I never wanted to live again because I'm a complete freeze baby]. I would feel bitter when these thoughts popped into my head: "I am doing this for her and she's not even helping me!" and "I am giving up a life I absolutely love in Seattle for HER. Why am I the only one giving anything up?" But I'd stop my inner dialogue and say, "IS that true? No. I WANT to be the daughter who takes care of her mom. And I WANT the opportunity to get the relationship with her that I always wanted." Therefore, I acknowledged to myself that I'm doing this move FOR ME and not for her. I'm getting what I want out of it. Immediately, my body would relax and MY HEART IMMEDIATELY FELT FULL. SEE THE SHIFT? FEEL THE DIFFERENCE?!? Seriously, it's THAT easy.]
❤ It FEELS better when we're checking in with "WHAT DO I WANT?" and "WHO DO I WANT TO BE?" This is because the thoughts, feelings and actions that follow are done with our true authentic self and we are showing up with integrity and love instead of anger, shame, fear, guilt,...and resentment. Try it. Let me know how it goes for you.
xoxo, Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
March 2022
An Interesting [and Disheartening] Article About Divorce Stats
An Interesting [and Disheartening] Article About Divorce Stats
November, 2021
An article about divorce isn't probably expected in a business that celebrates LOVE, but facts and stats are IMPORTANT. Below is a link to an article titled "Divorce Statistics: Over 115 Studies, Facts and Rates for 2020" by Wilkinson & Finkbeiner Family Law Attorneys in San Diego, CA.
Having [and USING] the Right Tools: Silly Eyeliner Analogy
Having [and USING] the Right Tools: Silly Eyeliner Analogy
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
November 2021
Ladies, you can definitely relate to this SILLY ANALOGY because it is makeup...but guys get it too when having JUST THE RIGHT TOOL for the job. For months, I've been using the same eyeliner. It is my favorite color from my Mary Kay collection: STEELY. It is a perfect blue-gray. I use a smudge brush after I put on my eyeliner to make it sexy and smoky -- whatever that means! I've been struggling with my upper lid having too much eyeliner so I go back with a cotton swab and try to make the line narrower.
One day, I remembered that Mary Kay has been putting little mini sharpeners on the ends of their lip and eye liners. It's not like it's new. They've been doing it for years! So I shrug my shoulders and try it.
Well, let me tell you, it made ALL THE DIFFERENCE in the world!! My eyeliner went on SO well: smoothly and narrow! I was thrilled! And also I wanted to kick myself. I had had this tool not only the whole time I'd had the eyeliner, but for years I've had the option and never used it. It made my life easier and my eyes prettier in far less time!
In life, WE KNOW how to do something with the TOOLS and strategies we've learned along the way but we choose to NOT use them for whatever reason. When we finally DO use them, we are very appreciative of the tool and the time it saved or the job it did.
Most of the time, we know what we SHOULD do to lose weight, get that project done, or improve our relationships but for whatever reasons we don't. Before you get to the end of your rope, let us help you!
original logo ^
original logo ^
our logo ^
our logo ^
HOW "The LOVE RelationSHOP" Name was Born!
HOW "The LOVE RelationSHOP" Name was Born!
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
October 2021
I had my idea forming of a business that specialized in helping established couples date each other again and reconnect. The name I came up with was Date Your Mate. Of course, the name has been used before and the domain is taken...plus I wanted something that encompassed not only COUPLES but also singles and education too!
One day, I was looking at website templates on my beloved VISTAPRINT and I saw one for a MOTORCYCLE REPAIR SHOP. I absolutely loved the photo logo and the photos! Immediately my mind was RACING coming up with PUNS and innuendoes! How FUN, playful, and sexy! That's exactly what I wanted for my business! And I love the idea of a REPAIR shop for broken hearts..not that I love the IDEA of broken hearts! We all have been hurt in the past. Learning from it instead of HURTING from it is our goal here.
So I started building the website on the template, and kept brainstorming names. When "The Love Relationshop" popped into my head, I couldn't let it go. Immediately checking to see if the domains were available, and if anyone else was using that phrase. I grabbed that one and 2 similar domains!
There are SO MANY fun metaphors and analogies between relationships and motorcycles! [From "hanging on for dear life" to "love handles" to "enjoying the journey...and the ride" to "fine tuning for PEAK performance" it's all playful and descriptive.] Just rolling with the PUNS and the sheer SEX APPEAL of motorcycle riding is half the fun of this site and program. The other half of the fun is providing an amazing resource to couples and singles in the TAMPA area....and eventually all over the country! Vrrroooommmm vrrrooommmm! ;)
Being 100% direct, while this "motorcycle repair shop" is the metaphorical theme of our business, we are NOT a biker's group nor a repair shop. And while we provide dates in an event like setting with other dedicated couples, this is not a swingers group.
─ helping you ─
ENJ♡Y the J♡URNEY
[ and the R-I-D-E ]
with your S♡LE mate
First Blog Entry...the idea is born...but it's still just a baby!
First Blog Entry...the idea is born...but it's still just a baby!
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
August 2021
In 2019 I started doing communication and relationship classes through my EROS in LOVE, Dating & Marriage for Singles and Couples MEETUP group in Spokane, WA. At the same time, I started a SPEED DATING MEETUP for singles in Spokane. Those two groups grew to 600+ people and I put on 13 events.
Unfortunately, COVID brought everything to a halt in March of 2020. For 5 months I waited out the pandemic, but there just wasn't any end in sight. All the ways I earned income [workshops, events, teaching elementary school, and could always fall back on waitressing] was not available to me because Washington was locked down pretty drastically.
Knowing I'd have to DO SOMETHING to earn money soon, I was looking at FLORIDA. I had visited Venice twice during the 2019/2020 winter and fell in love with a tropical life. Eventually I was planning on spending 3 months in Florida every winter for a few years and then retiring in Florida in about 5-10 years. I've always wanted to live in a warm climate. Finding out that Florida was pretty much "business as usual," I thought it might be a good idea to fast forward my plans so I could make a living again.
With that sad realization that Washington was just not opening up so I'd have to leave Spokane, in August 2020 I threw all my things into storage and moved 3,000 miles across the country to Venice, Florida!
After brainstorming 3 pages of possible names for singles groups, I started a new Meetup group in Venice called SINGLES MEET MARKET. It was for single people to meet other singles for fun and friendship. Our very first Meetup was on the Nokomis Beach on Sunday, November 1, 2020. Seven other people showed up...and there were only about 40 total people in the group. It was so awesome that everyone said they wanted to do it again. So, we met every Sunday afternoon for months.
In fact, over the next 6 months, I held 53 events...most of the free for singles. My group grew to 550 people. It was very rewarding...and SO many friendships were formed...but I wanted to do more than just do events for SINGLES! I saw people struggling with new relationships and dating in general...not to mention on-line dating! I was thinking about adding EROS to my Florida repertoire.
Deciding to move north for personal reasons, I gave my Venice Meetup away so I could start a new chapter in the Greater Tampa Bay area. This time, the SINLGES part would be just 1/5th of the whole business.
Title
Title
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
2022
Title
Title
Love Musings By Erica
Tampa's Love Muse
March 2022